Things will never be the same again! Until it happens again next year!

13 Sep

Few words should bother the modern comic book fan as much as the line, “Things will never be the same!” The line gets thrown around a lot and more often than not, you know a few things right off the bat.  First, you know that things will be the same sooner than later.  You also know you will probably be reading a story full of “emotional moments” that really don’t pan out. Unfortunately, even with this being fairly common knowledge, both of the big two have made this announcement in the last month. 

For example, DC announced that Superman and Wonder Woman were going to start dating.  In the most recent issue of Justice League, Clark and Diana kissed.  In the Justice League International Annual, it was revealed this would change the future in a horrible way and Booster Gold vanished.  Right afterwards, they announced that Clark and Lois may never date again!  Oh the horrors!  Clark and his former wife might not ever even date. I never would have guessed this.  But the point is, Superman and Wonder Woman have dated before in every main reality DC has published and even in some of the alternate realities they published.  And Alan Moore even made a brilliant statement about it 20 years ago when he had Wonder Woman point out that it was too obvious.  Meanwhile, Clark and Lois always end up dating.  Sometimes more successfully, sometimes less.  But the characters were literally made for each other.  Even if Geoff and Co. chose to not have the couple restored during their tenure over DC, the next group will. 

Over at Marvel, Professor X died again.  Bendis went on the comics’ blogs today and made the fabled announcement that things would never be the same. He also explained that Professor X would be more important dead than alive.  Now, as someone who doesn’t read Marvel regularly, this sounded familiar so I quickly wiki checked.  Sure enough, this has happened at least four times already.  Now, many characters have died and returned but this seems to happen to X more frequently than other characters.  Then, the writer talks of how groundbreaking the storyline would be.  The next writers come in, bring Charles back, and then kill him all over again.  My personal favorite version of the storyline would be when Legion, his son killed him.  And so what did Bendis claim today?  He claimed that all of the emotion would be generated when the man who is like a son to Charles becomes Charles’s killer.  Sounded incredibly familiar. 

Personally, I don’t mind killing Charles again.  I don’t mind Wonder Woman and Superman dating again.  I just wish the companies, authors, and everyone would stop pretending they are telling such original stories and that “things would never be the same again.”  It just doesn’t work.  Honestly, the nature of the business is that the storylines are cyclical. Some of these characters have been published weekly for eighty years almost.  It is difficult to come up with completely new stories.  Tell your stories and let us enjoy them.  Maybe I will enjoy Charles’s 43 death.  But please don’t try and sell me on it being a brilliant new direction that has never happened before.

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